- Unevenly scooping Neapolitan ice cream in parallel rows along the chocolate and strawberry sections resulting in a disproportionate remainder of vanilla.
- Throwing away the square clip ties that come with more expensive loaves of bread, as these are quicker and more efficient than using the cheaper twist-tie variety that must be laboriously looped around itself to reseal the bread bag.
- Returning empty ice cube trays to the fridge.
- Replacing empty containers of any kind in their usual spot after the last of the food has been drained from them, leaving future consumers in search of their favorite food or drink to excitedly grab the package before feeling the emptiness propel it upward at an unexpected rate that signals the victim’s disappointment at not being able to enjoy the desired portion of cereal, fruit juice, or Ritz crackers that he or she originally craved.
- Dirtying and placing in the dishwasher all of one type of dish before enough other dishes have been so dirtied, creating the predicament of whether to run a three-quarters empty dishwasher, individually wash the desired dish, or improvise using other items that may serve as an acceptable substitute.
- Not doing a proper refrigerator and pantry check before going to the supermarket, then erring on the side of over- rather than under-shopping so as to imbalance the ratio of perishable food items (for example: three dozen eggs, two gallons of milk, four pounds of liverwurst, two cabbages) to nonperishable ones and forcing cohabiters to use up those items in excess before they expire.
- In the aforementioned situation, consuming the perishable items with the later date rather than those closest to expiration, either through negligence, or on the grounds that the chosen item “probably tastes better.”
- Using Miracle Whip for any purpose other than immediate disposal.
4 comments:
With the current potential of us becoming house mates in the future I would like to make some comments on this post.
-"Throwing away the square clip ties that come with more expensive loaves of bread" Take your bag of bread, spin it until a tight twist has formed at the opening, fold under bag, place in fridge. Twist ties are a waist of time and plastic.
-"Dirtying and placing in the dishwasher all of one type of dish before enough other dishes have been so dirtied" This is at times unavoidable, living with my family we are constantly using up all of the cereal bowls and sometimes spoons before the dishwasher becomes full resulting the need to improvise (my preferred course of action). This happens sometimes, it is lame but hardly worthy of being considered a "crime". Granted the last time I lived with one other person we never used the dishwasher as we would have ran out of dishes before it became full.
-"consuming the perishable items with the later date rather than those closest to expiration" in the restaurant world we call this FIFO (First In First Out).
-I grew up on Miracle Whip, don't knock it =P
You grew up on Miracle Whip? I hate that shit so much. Good call on the bread ties though...though I'm not too big a fan of putting bread in the fridge. (Dan: I hope you see this post.)
I also think that since whatever pad we rent couldn't possibly be nice enough to have its own dishwasher, we're safe from number two.
I agree with Stu 75%. (The 25% leftover would be the Miracle Whip. That stuff is gross)
Might I suggest adding a comment re Kitchen Crimes suggesting that a sink full of dirty, cold, germ-infested washing up water is not a magnet for more dirty dishes 'cause the Clean Ktchen Fairy does not exist..never has..never will. The real worry is when the erkie dishwater becomes so bad that even the cockroaches leave town.
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